Mitt Romney is Reportedly Suffering From Severe Bain Damage

Romney in Monty Python "My Brain Hurts" sketch As our readers can tell, we’ve got plenty of local and regional news to cover right now — but can we take just a moment to savor what’s happening to Mitt Romney right now?

He’s arguing that he had nothing to do with Bain Capital from 1999 to 2002, despite the fact that:

  • he attested to the SEC that he was the sole shareholder, CEO, President, and Chairman of the Board
  • he was flown out for meetings in which Bain was involved
  • he attested to companies into which Bain was entering into business relationships that he was in charge (one of these being Stericycle, a company that — and I’m not kidding here — disposed of the post-abortion fetal remains)
  • he said that he was still active in Bain as part of explaining why he was eligible to run for Governor of Massachusetts in 2002
  • his very DENIAL of involvement in Bain during these years (of outsourcing and such) shows that he thinks that Bain’s record is politically radioactive, and
  • the only way a trusted adviser could explain his being both in charge and not-in-charge of Bain for these three years is to say that in 2002 he had “retroactively resigned”

I’m trying to make myself feel even a little bit bad for Romney, but whenever I do all I can come up with is something like “I feel your Bain,” which I know is inappropriate.

And all of this doesn’t even count the refusal to produce his tax returns — 23 years of which he had already given to John McCain when he was being considered for Vice-President in 2008, so we know that they’re prepared! — and to deal with his tax havens in the Caymans, Switzerland, and the Bahamas — which when he addresses will, I presume, show that he’s taking advantage of tax shelters that are not available to any but the very wealthy because of the strenuous and effective lobbying of the very wealthy.

We have literally reached the point where people are saying that the only way for Mitt to win is not to go with a safe Portman/Pawlenty sort of appointment, but to choose someone exciting, like Sen. Jim DeMint, or Donald Trump, or Herman Cain, or Snooki, or Debra Pauly.  I want to feel human sympathy for him — but, well, I’d want to see his manufacturing certificate first.

We’re having an unusual problem at OJB at the moment — one of actually having too much material to publish — so I probably shouldn’t put this story up, but I just can’t let the weekend pass without marking the occasion.  Oh well, if it creates a problem, I can always go back and not have published it — retroactively.

About Greg Diamond

Somewhat verbose attorney, semi-retired due to disability, residing in northwest Brea. Occasionally runs for office against bad people who would otherwise go unopposed. Got 45% of the vote against Bob Huff for State Senate in 2012; Josh Newman then won the seat in 2016. In 2014 became the first attorney to challenge OCDA Tony Rackauckas since 2002; Todd Spitzer then won that seat in 2018. Every time he's run against some rotten incumbent, the *next* person to challenge them wins! He's OK with that. Corrupt party hacks hate him. He's OK with that too. He does advise some local campaigns informally and (so far) without compensation. (If that last bit changes, he will declare the interest.)