Calling Broxton, Woods & James – Ambulance Chasers

Let’s start this right:  Jonathan Roy Broxton – $5 to $6 Million dollars a year.  Tiger Woods – $40 Million dollars base salary.  Lebron James – $14 Million base a year for 5 years!.

Complaining about how much Sports Heroes make could be an effort in futility.  Of course if you are talking about the City Manager of Bell, The Police Chief or any of the sitting city Council people….those salaries might seem downright plausible.

Somehow, sports people have gotten a little out of hand.  We might blame it on “Dancing with the Stars”, the initial Terrell Owens dropped pants with a “Desparate Housewife”, or is it maybe even the thought of retired Coach and Football Commentator Jimmy Johnson going on Survivor with a thong?!  Chad Ocho Cinco is another, “What’s Your Line” candidate!  Maybe, it is just the terrible thought that someone like Kate Goslin (8 kids are enough!)….being watched by anyone, doing anything, at any time!  “Live from New York…..”Ugh!

So, back to the issue:  We will start with the least offensive member of our fantasy want-a-be  “Jacoby & Myers Law Firm”.  The 300 lb. 6’4″ mountain of blubber gut, has broken Dodger fans hearts too many times this season.  Whether he has three outs or  nine to get…he has a wonderful way of letting the other team make enough runs to beat the Dodgers – at the very last moment.  The Dodgers pay Broxton – $11 million dollars for two years of work.  Hopefully, he has put a little away for those days when he gets traded to Pittsburgh.  Our advice:  Jonathan, throw all your worries to the winds.  Go out there and throw because you want to see how many of the opposing team you can hit with a 95MPH fastball before the umps kick you out of the game!

Tiger Woods makes a paltry $40 Million dollars a year as his base salary.  His feet and feats are seemingly made of clay.  Poor Tiger is still worth over a $Billion bucks until Elin gets her hands on her share of the family fortune.  Meanwhile, Tiger has refused to take the year off, refused to stop making stupid/dumb comments after he goes 10 shots over par.  Tiger just needs a full time Nanny.  Too bad Julie Andrews isn’t available to do her “Mary Poppins” character with Tiger for a couple of years!  Tiger really needs that umbrella!  Our advice:  Retire to Amsterdam Tiger for two years and then come back strong – after the 2012 elections.

Lebron James only makes $14 Million dollars a year.  So it is understandable why he feels “less than”.  Lebron has the worst affinity for being on TV, fist pumping, chest banging and looking very mean into the camera.  Who do you think you are Lebron – Kobe?  Lebron just loves to Over Act!  He kind of reminds us of those early 60’s TV bad guy heavies on both cop and cowboy shows.  Lebron like all the others in our fantasy law firm – still thinks it is all about “him”!  Well, why not?  His mom told him so…he best pals think so…even Carmelo thinks so!  How can you not believe that group?  Maybe Michael Vick will send you a “Best of Luck in 2011” card.   Our advice:  Lebron, go on “Dancing with the Stars” and choose Cheryl as your partner.  you do need to find your own personality.  Or change it – immediately!

The ego drive by those focused in the public eye is a compelling issue.  We look around and we see it strongly exposed in politics, with the likes of John Edwards and Mark Sanford.  We see it even in local politics at almost every level.  When we do meet genuinely kind and caring human beings in the public eye….we are truly amazed.  So few have time for all the “little people”!  It seems so easy for these folks to somehow, make too much money to listen to anyone, that they are so sensitized that their hearing fails them constantly.

Shania Twain had a great song, some years back:  “That don’t Impress Me Much!”  We dedicate this song to two special mentions:  Ben Roethlisberger of the Pittsburgh Steelers and Jeremiah Masoli of Mississippi.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqFLXayD6e8&feature=av2e

Dedicated to All Politicians and Sports Heroes with “The Illness”!


About Ron & Anna Winship

Independent News Producers/Writers and Directors for Parker-Longbow Productions. Independent Programming which includes a broad variety of Political, Entertainment and Professional Personalities. Cutting Edge - a talk show...is the flagship of over 30 URL websites developed or under development. The Winships have been blogging for the Orange Juice since back when nickels had buffalos on them, and men wore onions attached to their belts, because it was the fashion back then.