Tiger in the tank!

The next fifteen minutes of fame for Tiger Woods arrived today with his prepared statement in front of 20 of his close associates….including his mom.  At first, his apology seemed to be sincere.  Then, as his voice rose and his condemnation of the papparazzi grew in regard to tracking after his two year old daughter….and then his stunning accusation that false  reports of Elin whacking him in the mouth came to pass…..suddenly, we were getting the idea tha this was just “self-aggrandizement Part II”.

His mention of returning to golf sometime soon…..was despicable and especially inappropriate.  Tiger was just reassuring his many sponsors….that he had control of the situation and that they shouldn’t be dumping him.  Tiger even used the mention of his youth foundation as a lever along with his many repeated “so sorry” sound bites.  Tiger was even kind enough to mention that when he returned to the golf course….he would restrict the number of “F bombs” and “other things”.  Thanks Tiger….we were really worried about that!

Tiger threats to the media were patently stupid.  “What goes on between me and my wife…….are going to remain private!” say Tiger.  Well, Tiger boy…..that could have happened if you had not “screwed the pooch” over the last five years.  It was “your behavior” that has made the many impositions on your family, friends and collegues…..no one else.  Your private life will now be as open as a cheap suitcase!  That is; if you return to Touring Golf!

It was purely a case of “Tiger, not knowing when to shut up”.  He kept going like the “Energizer Bunny” when he should have made the message short and sweet:  “You are looking at someone who made a series of bad judgments for both my career, my sport and my family.  I am completely sorry to all.  I will be using the months and years ahead, through dedicated effort – to redeem myself.  Thank you!”  Sadly, that suggested message took 15 minutes, added to covering for his sponsors and while still worried that Elin may be arrested for domestic violence.

Instead of a 30 second many times repeated sound bite…..the media now has weeks of disecting to go with.   When Gloria Allred and her Porn Star clinic followed Tiger’s comments……put a fork in Tiger…….he is done!

http://www.celebitchy.com/90390/tigers_porn_star_mistress_in_press_conference_against_golf_balls_w_her_face_on_them/

Guess Tiger didn’t want to pay the Porn Star – Day Player rates!  What a story this is!

In the meantime, we don’t want you on tour anymore Tiger.  Time for your mandatory retirement from playing.  No 18th Major win, or 100th Major win to redeem you brother……keep up the good work with your Foundation and keep designing those Golf Courses.  You will never miss a meal and can spend a whole bunch of time with inter-city kids…..teaching them to play golf.  Maybe creating another Tiger….this time one without feet of clay!

About Ron & Anna Winship

Independent News Producers/Writers and Directors for Parker-Longbow Productions. Independent Programming which includes a broad variety of Political, Entertainment and Professional Personalities. Cutting Edge - a talk show...is the flagship of over 30 URL websites developed or under development. The Winships have been blogging for the Orange Juice since back when nickels had buffalos on them, and men wore onions attached to their belts, because it was the fashion back then.