Bring back Bob!

This just came in on the transom (not sure what a transom is, but we borrowed Matt’s):

Hunger strikers say “Bring back Bob!”

ORANGE – Anti-war protesters from various leftist organizations gathered again today at Congresswoman Loretta Sanchez’ office to urge “her to sign our pledge to end funding and to inquire if the C-17 can be funded some other way.”

Orange Juice blogger Claudio Gallegos showed up and discussed the protest while downing a juicy double burger. Afterwards the protest leaders decided it was time to take the protest to another level.

One protester, who was wearing a black ski mask and who called himself “El Comandante” said that the next step for the group would be to call up former Congressman Robert K. Dornan.

“We need to bring back Bob,” said El Comandante. “With Bob at least we know that he is wrong 100% of the time. It makes it easier to protest him. With Loretta we know that she is with us 99% of the time – but we need to make her pay for that 1% difference.”

Another protester, named Rainbow, had this to say, “I think it really sucks that Claudio ate that big double burger in front of us. I am really hungry now. This hunger strike really blows.”

We also spoke to a group of protesters who were dressed up like clowns. Their leader was named Garzo. We asked him what he thought about bringing back Dornan.

“I am all for it,” said Garzo. “Who cares about airplanes? At least if Bob is back we don’t need any more planes as his nickname is B-1. Surely he can let our military borrow some of his bombers.”

I asked Garzo how we would employ the union workers who would be laid off if C-17 production stopped. “Well,” he said, “We can maybe show them how to hunger strike and how to be clowns.”

Can they make money as clowns, we asked. Garzo responded, “Who cares? Can’t they go on welfare or something? This is another reason to bring back Bob. He saved Miguel Pulido’s muffler shop. Maybe he can find a way to help the workers.”

We told Garzo that Dornan is a conservative Republican. “So what,” he replied. “Loretta used to be a Republican – and we still don’t trust her. Also, I heard her cat Gretzky is a Republican. Wasn’t Gretzky a rich white guy? I just don’t trust that fat white cat.”

Activists interested in joining the “Bring back Bob” campaign can email the organizers at garzothe payaso@bringbackbob.com.


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"Admin" is just editors Vern Nelson, Greg Diamond, or Ryan Cantor sharing something that they mostly didn't write themselves, but think you should see. Before December 2010, "Admin" may have been former blog owner Art Pedroza.