Tito’s TK-Burger-gate!


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Huntington Beach’s very popular TK Burger, mere steps from the Pier,
follows the law, and cares about Covid,
and so you have to wear a mask to order there.
TITO NO LIKE.

Sometimes Tito Watch can be a little depressing, but other times – like today! – it’s a lot of fun. And frankly, after today’s FBI raid of Kristopher Dreww’s HB apartment, we needed this laugh. 

This weekend, Huntington Beach Mayor Pro Temporary Tito Ortiz went for a bike ride on the beach with his family, and like any self-respecting HB native, stopped at TK Burger for a “cheat day” lunch. Unfortunately, Tito “forgot” his mask at home, so TK Burger was unable to serve him… and as we’re all too aware, Tito Ortiz uses his Instagram story the way Donald Trump used his Twitter (when he had one, LMAO). 

“Lose my business, lose HB’s business… SUCK.”

We’ve become accustomed to Tito’s complaints about mask mandates, but this time, Tito didn’t just tell TK Burger they’d be losing his business– he took it upon himself as a city official to speak for all of us. “Lose my business, lose HB’s business,” decreed the self-important councilman. HB may have elected Tito in a landslide, but TK Burger is an institution. They’ve inhabited the same shack on PCH and 1st Street since the 1980s, and they’re a favorite of tourists and surfers alike. 

Strange he’d threaten a beloved, locally-owned downtown restaurant after spending months bragging about how he “protected” downtown businesses during the protests in June. But, ironically, Tito can still call himself “pro-business,” because his little temper tantrum inspired hundreds of people to eat at TK Burger on Monday. 

Mayor Kim Carr led the charge, posting a masked TK Burger selfie to her own Instagram story mere hours after Tito’s meltdown.

This tweet, from the Mayor, is “deliciously petty.”

Once the news hit HB’s Facebook community forums, everyone turned up, masked and distanced, to support. 

“At first I was for Tito Ortiz on HB City Council,” said one disappointed resident, “but after this tantrum, I can see your true colors, bro. I’ll make sure to stop by TK and grab some food.”

Even Betty Flynn, Tito’s star-crossed appointee for the Homeless Task Force, took TK Burger’s side. Though she was annoyed by the number of burger selfies posted on Facebook, she confessed in a comment, “So many posts, but guess what I had for lunch??? TK.” (Advertising working on a subliminable level and all.)

See, Tito?  These people are all wearing masks.  IT’S NOT THAT FUCKING HARD.

After 24 hours of being bombarded by criticism and outrage (imagining receiving that many notifications sends a chill up my spine), Tito finally took a deep breath, put on his big boy undies, and apologized to TK Burger on Facebook.

Dude, I think using your very public platform to the detriment of a local business goes a little beyond a “bad decision.”

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Epilogue

Later, when one of his constituents asked if he would consider wearing a mask now, Tito replied, “Nope. Sorry.”

Previously in this series:
And Our Tito Watch Begins…
Tito Tries a Council Meeting!
Tito and Facial Coverings: A Dark Surf City Comedy
#SaveOurChildren… and How it Doesn’t.
Champion of the Oppressed: Unmasked Tito Thrown out of Meeting.
Tito’s World 2: The HB Mayor Pro-Tem’s Plan to Kill Your Grandma.


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